Old Hymns

Sitting on a bar stool, in this smoky haze
Got a gin and tonic to clear my mind
Sitting here thinking about the return of Jesus Christ
And the way it’s all gonna end
I ain’t no bible scholar but I read a page or two
He was here once, guess he’s coming back soon
Will it be a big, big bang or soft and gentle
Like the summertime rain on the old porch roof
Will I even notice, will I run outside to see
Jesus coming down through the clouds
He lifts me up, I’m flying high
Looking down on all you left below
When the roll is called up yonder, I’ll be there


When we all get to heaven
What a day of rejoicing that will be
We’ll all be in paradise, but some of us more so than others
There’s a special place set up for the privileged
Body and blood of Christ, this holy meal
Well, it turns into a big fatty steak with 25 year old scotch 
Well, up there you have all them TV preachers who sent us to hell
Republican politicians will be there and maybe 2 or 3 lucky democrats
Super rich guys will be there with their super skinny wives
And the guys who were the stars of my high school
Well, I’ll be in there somewhere but I got to work harder than you
Make sure my appetites don’t get the best of me
When the roll is called up yonder, I’ll be there


Well, I’ll be there with my hobo brothers
And all my dirty derelict friends
I haven’t always been real good, but I tried just the best that I could
This stuff doesn’t come easy
We’ll be sitting around feasting, we’ll be praising the Lord the best we know how
Like the Bible says, blessed are the poor
Blessed are the weak, blessed are the humble
Blessed are the kicked around and beat up
Blessed are the spit upon and blessed are the drunk, the dirty, the worthless
And blessed are the lonely
We’ll be there singing our drunken hobo praises
We’ll be happy just to be somewhere other than here
When the roll is called up yonder, I’ll be there